Dude Looks Like A Lady

Coco got her first haircut this weekend. It was traumatic for her during, and traumatic for us after. Basically because she now looks like a boy. For reals.

We went to a specialty shop just for kids. They offer the first haircut in a special little chair shaped like a little car, they play cartoons and have plenty of books and toys to distract and if the little ones are good enough (which of course they always are) they get to grab something from the toy drawer when they are finished. This would all be well and good if Coco were more than 11 months old. As it stood she had no idea what was going on in this noisy colorful place, nor why some grey-haired old man was messing with her head while Mommy and Daddy stood by yelling encouragement over the blaring TV.

The man, Patrick, who has been doing this since God was a boy I’d imagine, was a pro – I will give him that. He was quick, kind and good at what he does. But he didn’t spend a lot of time consulting us about what we wanted to do. The main goal was to get Cora’s bangs out of her face. We were having to clip her bangs back with a barrette all the time which would inevitably fall out ... multiple times a day. If we didn’t clip them back however, she would swipe at her eyes trying to get the hair away, which if she did so while trying to crawl would most always result in her “going poof” (I refuse to say “boom” – its just too creepy to me to say your kid went “boom”).

The other weird thing about the whole process was that after the cut, he blew her hair dry with a dryer (confusing her to pieces) and then took a small-barrelled professional curling iron and curled her wispy hair. As if that wasn’t weird enough, he then finished with a fine misting of hair spray. I was having horror visions of Jon Benet Ramsey at that point and neuroticising over what chemicals were in the hairspray, but of course, it did look cute with her chubby little apple cheeks. Or at least it looked cute until bathtime. Once we got home that evening and gave her a bath, we realized that while the thick curls were adorable, our child has stick straight hair. We went from Shirley Temple to Moe of the Three Stooges. She basically had a horrible baby bowl cut. Hubby and I both looked at each other and said “Ummm… she looks like a boy.” And indeed she did.

It will grow – that is what we, and everyone else, keep telling ourselves. But its hard to see our little girl look suddenly blasé and oddly plain. Its as if she was a little female baby Sampson. Of course she couldn’t care less and is much happier I’m sure not having to swipe at her bangs or get whacked in the forehead with a dangling barrette. So for the most part, Mommy and Daddy will build a bridge and get over it. But I can tell you she’s wearing a LOT more pink these days…..